Setting Healthy Boundaries | Episode 22

In this episode, Joanne explores the importance of setting healthy boundaries for maintaining healthy relationships and promoting overall well-being. She discusses what healthy boundaries are, why they are important, and how to establish and maintain them. Joanne delves into the role of self-care in boundary-setting and provides examples of self-care boundaries. She also addresses the challenges of setting boundaries and offers tips for navigating the process with self-compassion and flexibility. Whether you struggle with saying no, feel guilty about prioritizing your needs, or simply want to learn more about setting healthy boundaries, this episode offers valuable insights and practical advice. Join Joanne as she explores the power of healthy boundaries in creating a more fulfilling and positive life.

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*This podcast does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment and its contents are intended for informational purposes only.

Transcript

Welcome to Episode Twenty two of our Full Spectrum Wellness Podcast. I'm so happy and excited to be back here with you for our twenty-second episode.

Today I will be discussing the importance of setting healthy boundaries. Boundaries are essential in maintaining healthy relationships, but they can be difficult to establish and maintain. In this episode, we will explore what healthy boundaries are, why they are important, and how you can set them.

What are healthy boundaries? Boundaries are limits we set for ourselves and others in our lives. Healthy boundaries are boundaries that allow us to have healthy
relationships with ourselves and with others. They are the guidelines we establish for what we are comfortable with and what we are not comfortable with. Healthy boundaries can include physical, emotional, and mental boundaries.

Why are healthy boundaries important? Setting healthy boundaries is important for
several reasons. Firstly, they help us to maintain our physical, emotional, and
mental health. When we have clear boundaries, we know what is acceptable and
what is not, and this can help us to avoid situations that may be harmful or
detrimental to our well-being.

Secondly, healthy boundaries help us to establish and maintain healthy relationships.
When we have clear boundaries, we are able to communicate our needs and
expectations to others. This can prevent misunderstandings and conflicts in our
relationships.

Finally, healthy boundaries help us to maintain our sense of self. When we have clear boundaries, we know who we are and what we stand for. This can help us to make decisions that are in line with our values and beliefs.

One of the benefits of setting healthy boundaries is that it can improve our overall sense of self-worth and confidence. When we communicate our boundaries assertively, we are sending a message to ourselves and others that we value our needs and prioritize our well-being. This can help us to feel more empowered and in control of our lives.

In addition to improving our self-esteem setting healthy boundaries can also enhance our relationships with others. When we communicate our boundaries clearly, we are giving others the opportunity to respect our needs and expectations. This can create a sense of mutual trust and respect in our interactions with others. setting healthy boundaries can help us to avoid unnecessary conflicts or misunderstandings. When we have clear boundaries, we are less likely to be taken advantage of or to engage in
behaviour that is harmful or inappropriate. This can create a more harmonious
and positive environment for ourselves and those around us.

How can you set healthy boundaries? Setting healthy boundaries can be challenging, but it is an important skill to develop. Here are some steps you can take to set healthy boundaries:

1. Identify your boundaries: The first step in setting healthy boundaries is to identify what your boundaries are. Think about what makes you feel uncomfortable, what you are not willing to tolerate, and what you need in order to feel safe and comfortable. Identify your values and priorities. What is most important to you in your life? What are your non-negotiables? Use this information to guide you in setting boundaries that align with your values and goals.
2. Communicate your boundaries: Once you have identified your boundaries, it is important to communicate them clearly to others. Be assertive and communicate your boundaries in a way that is respectful but firm. Communicate clearly and respectfully. When communicating your boundaries to others, be assertive but respectful. Use "I" statements to express how their behaviour affects you, rather than placing blame or judgment on them.
3. Be consistent: Setting boundaries is not a one-time event. It is important to be consistent in enforcing your boundaries, even if it means saying no to someone or walking away from a situation that does not align with your boundaries.
4. Practice self-compassion: Setting boundaries can be challenging, and it is important to be patient and kind with yourself as you navigate this process. Remember that it is okay to make mistakes and to adjust your boundaries as needed.
5. Practice self-care: Setting boundaries can be emotionally and mentally draining. It is important to practice self-care and prioritize your well-being.
6. Seek support if needed: If you are struggling to set boundaries, consider seeking support from a therapist, coach, or trusted friend or family member. They can offer guidance and encouragement as you work to establish healthy boundaries.

As you can see setting healthy boundaries is a crucial aspect of self-care and maintaining healthy relationships. Without boundaries, we may find ourselves compromising our values, neglecting our needs, and feeling overwhelmed or resentful in our interactions with others.

One common misconception about boundaries is that they are selfish or unkind. However, setting boundaries is not about excluding or rejecting others. Rather, it is
about communicating our needs and expectations clearly and respectfully, and
taking responsibility for our own well-being.

For example, if you have a friend who often cancels plans last minute or is consistently
late, it is okay to communicate your boundaries around punctuality and
reliability. You can say something like, "I understand that things come
up, but when you cancel plans last minute, it makes me feel disrespected and
like my time is not valued. Going forward, I would appreciate if we could set a
time and stick to it."

Another important aspect of setting healthy boundaries is learning to say no. Saying no does not mean that you are unhelpful or uncooperative. It means that you are
honoring your own needs and priorities, and that you respect yourself enough to
decline requests or invitations that do not align with your values or goals.

For example, if your boss asks you to work overtime frequently and it is impacting your work-life balance, you can say something like, "I appreciate the opportunity to contribute to the team, but I am currently unable to work overtime regularly. I am happy to help when I can, but I need to prioritize my personal time and commitments."

One important aspect of setting healthy boundaries is recognizing that boundaries can vary depending on the situation and the people involved. For example, your boundaries with a close friend may be different from your boundaries with a co-worker or family member. It is important to be flexible and adaptable in your boundary-setting, while still prioritizing your needs and values.

Another
important consideration when setting boundaries is the role of self-care. Self-care involves taking deliberate actions to promote our physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Setting healthy boundaries can be an act of self-care, as it allows us to prioritize our own needs and limit exposure to situations or people that may be harmful or draining.

Examples of self-care boundaries may include setting aside time for rest and relaxation, saying no to social invitations when you need time to recharge, or setting
boundaries around your use of technology or social media. By prioritizing your
self-care needs, you are investing in your own health and happiness, which can
have positive ripple effects on your relationships and overall well-being.

It is also important to recognize that setting boundaries can be a process of trial and error. It’s a continuous process, and it may take time and practice to find what works for you. You may need to adjust your boundaries as you learn more about what works for you and what doesn't. It is okay to make mistakes or experience discomfort as you navigate this process. Remember that setting healthy boundaries is a skill that takes time and practice to develop your boundary-setting skills, you will likely feel more confident and empowered in your relationships. 

Finally, it is worth noting that setting healthy boundaries is not about controlling or manipulating others. Rather, it is about taking responsibility for our own well-being and communicating our needs and expectations clearly and respectfully. When we establish healthy boundaries, we create a more positive and harmonious environment for ourselves and those around us.

Setting healthy boundaries is an essential part of maintaining healthy relationships and a healthy sense of self. By identifying your boundaries, values and priorities, communicating clearly and respectfully, and being consistent in enforcing them, practising self-compassion and self-care, taking responsibility for your own well-being, and seeking support if needed, you can establish healthy boundaries that help you to maintain your physical, emotional, and mental health, honour your needs, values and priorities and support your growth and happiness. 

Remember to prioritize self-care and be patient with yourself as you develop this important skill. Thank you for listening to this episode of the podcast. Setting healthy boundaries is also the topic for the month of April in our Self-care & Wellness Newsletter Club. When you subscribe you will receive our FREE printable Self-care Guide/Workbook and regular emails, participate in our monthly competition, keep up to date with what's on, get access to exclusive offers and much more! Just pop along to https://newsletter.thefullspectrumcentrelimited.co.uk/subscribe to subscribe.

I hope you enjoyed this episode and I look forward to next time.